Downward Spiral

Judging by what's going on around me right now, Downward Spiral is the term. Over the last 2 days, a lot of things have happened which left me gasping for breath. It starts of with the early morning shocker from the Administration that our band will not be allowed to perform for the coming Annual Day. This led to more weird discussions about the band attempting to play at a Rock Band Competition (which i think is shit without a proper bass player). Then came up more ideas about the band trying to play at another college's Annual Day which I kinda accepted because that would look like a slap on the Administrative Officer. Anyway, when unexpected things happen, we tend to do more unexpected things. But the whole chapter sent my interest and confidence crashing down...

Over all this, my Soccer woes are back, this time with a new face. Everyone praises the Aero Soccer team for it's star-studded nature. But just like the rest of the Star-Studded teams, we fail to make it large when needed. This time again, we thought we had a good line-up, but when we groped into the details, we found that, though we had a good defence, the mid-field had no players at all. The Attacking front looked okay with Chakradhar out there, but it seemed like there is a big hole in the mid-field. For a few minutes, we felt we were forgetting someone. The someone who would take up charge in the mid-field. But we never found anyone like that, and it was then we realised, we didn't have a good team after-all. It's just another team with a few good players. Infact, looking strength-power wise, the other teams have got great advantage over us. We are all mildly skilled players who focus on fair-play and a tactical game. The others give a damn about tactics and their huge personalities can out-do any major attacking formations... Adding to that, the team fitness is low, with Kamaz and Chakradhar slightly injured and me totally devoid of stamina, power and accuracy. The soccer woes have started and the match tomorrow will be the ticket to the next one. If we don't win tomorrow, Aero's already horrible score in the tournament with be highlighted with a Star-Studded loss ...

Yet again, over all this, my real purpose of attending college is a big hollow. I am worrying myself with crazy Administrators, scary looking opponents, etc, and hardly reminding myself about why I attend college. The score in the online exams this time, has been my worst ever set in my entire college life (even after including the Descriptive scores). Infact, I have gotten so used to getting 5/20 that I am rejoicing if I get 8/20 (which is a pass). Life has stooped to that level, and here are friends still mocking me that I finished first in the 2-2 semester. That looks like a far-away dream for me now. Horrible stuff happening around me right now, and I am so happy I have my iPod to save me. I recently created a "Moody" playlist which works like magic when one feels like how I am feeling right now.

A few hours of soothing music can bring me back to life, and thankfully, today has been slightly better compared to yesterday. The band has been re-considered, I got 13/20 which calls for a party with cocktails, and I had fun in the 15 min I spent playing soccer (trying to keep the ball off the ground and passing around for as long as you can - use your leg, shoulder, head, chest, anything you find !!), and the ThrowBall competition left us laughing like mad though Aero got knocked out again.

Seeing the points right, I feel a burning desire to outsmart every opponent that comes in our way. But we still don't have a clue how to tackle our midfielders ...